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2006年05月01日

Google Shrugged

If you have not read Atlas Shrugged, you should. Even if you were painted head to toe in red waiving your hammer and sickle this May Day, the book is an entertaining read. Actually, for entertainment, The Fountainhead is, in my opinion, a better sample of Ayn Rand. For those of you living in a literary black hole (that means you, Internet User), Ayn Rand is a capitalist philosopher who expresses her economic theory, not always with the greatest subtlety, through fiction.

The plot of Atlas Shrugged is quite well known, but if you do plan on reading it and if you have not yet been exposed to the story, I will preserve for you the pleasure of unravelling the mystery for yourself. Stop reading now. You can go, read the book, come back, and see what I have to say next week. I am not going anywhere. In the next paragraph I will spoil the story.

Ah, impatience. My eighth favourite sin. So you have decided to keep reading. Well, during the book, the intelligentsia, the captains of industry, keep mysteriously disappearing one by one. I will skip over the political and economic lesson and synopsize by explaining that fed up with the slackers and reactionaries in the real world, all the bright minds and hard workers have run away to create their own new land of efficiency, enterprise, and determination.

I have been doing a bit of job shopping so I made a search in my favourite, omnipotent search engine. You know, the one with the cute coloured letters, the simple interface, the lightning speed. I presented a simple query to this all-seeing oracle of truth: "unix jobs". Before spotting even the top search result, one of the prophet's strategically placed Sponsored Links caught my eye.

"Love UNIX?" it said. Well, not enough to use proper capitalization, I thought, but "yes I suppose so".

"Enjoy system administration? Come work at Google."

Smelling prey, it dangled a lure. I clicked. I peeked. I perused. Then I found this video. A typical, cheesy, corporate intro with bubbly music and graphics lulls you into a sense of happy complacency. Less than a minute in, however, my blood began to run cold. By the end of the video I would realize even the seemingly innocuous introduction is calculated to give this multi-billion dollar goliath the vibrant, dynamic feel of a ten-dollar startup.

The smart people really are disappearing. From our world. Where are all the smart people going? To a place where they can run free, unhindered by scepticism and myopia, unchained by mediocrity, to the happiest place on Earth: to Google.

The video hostess takes us through all the reasons you should work there. A pillowcase full of candy for budding genius: bright people, fast moving, balanced lifestyle, mentoring, personal influence, tech talks, free (organic) food, child care (OK, not so interested in that one), and small company "feel". Finally, the forbidden fruit, for anyone who has his own idea, in other words, for any creative person, there is the "20 percent time" rule. Engineers can devote 20 percent of their time to projects they are "passionate about".

Time to get a job at Google? You had better be qualified. The VP of Engineering says "it's not a requirement that you come from a top engineering school" with the unspoken implication "as long as you have a PhD". Read through some of the job postings. You think you would be happy sweeping the floors of their offices? I hope you have a BS (MS preferred).

Even if you do not work for Google, we all work for Google in some way. As the Illuminati trade their 20 percent time for an idea to be owned in perpetuity by Google, we commoners trade our intimate correspondence for the convenience of Gmail, the privacy of our schedules for Google Calendar, and our every action on the Internet for Google Web Accelerator.

Google picks up where Ayn Rand left off. The great minds and leaders of Ayn Rand's tale were content to go off and create a new world. Not only is Google sucking up the worlds smart people, but from their new world they are enveloping our old world under an umbrella of fiendishly clever services. I hope you're Feeling Lucky when they roll out Google Government. Oh, and where do I submit my resume again?

Posted by William at 2006年05月01日 22:21

Comments

Posted by: Jason at 2006年05月02日 10:04

Posted by: William at 2006年05月02日 10:51

Posted by: Kelly at 2006年05月02日 11:09

Posted by: goodman at 2006年05月17日 22:26