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2005年11月07日

No Durians!

The computer occupies more and more and more of my time.

Without Internet access at my various points of accommodation through Europe, and without the income to justify that kind of big expenditure, I (dis)contented myself with foul smelling ergonomically inferior Internet cafes. Like a dialysis machine, it kept me going but it's not the real thing.

When I reached Singapore I decided it was finally time to replace my ailing laptop, a Dell Inspiron 7000 so humble it was more trouble than benefit to take with me, with something current.

Casual research determined there were two places advisable for the purchase of electronics: Sim Lim Square and Funan IT Mall. Whilst theory holds that it is possible to find better deals at Sim Lim, my friend Ming kindly put it this way: "Even locals get ripped off". So despite the enjoyable thrill of walking into the merchants den wearing the universal skin colour of "sucker" (white) and fighting a greedy salesman, tooth and nail, down to 10% above the Manufacturer's Suggested Retail Price, I opted for the sanitized comfort of Funan IT Mall.

I approached Funan with the giddy anticipation of a 7-year-old boy about to discover Toys R Us. Ok, any male of the species about to discover Toys R Us. For the female readers, I suppose it would be like walking into a shoe store.

I stepped through the sliding glass doors into a blast of air conditioning, a blanket of light, and a surge of serotonin. The giant, cavernous atrium revealed level upon level; a thousand little shops full of expensive shiny little treats in brushed aluminium and moulded plastic. Computers, cameras, parts, books, videos, and accessories.

My research was conducted over days and through many shops. In Singapore, the prescribed style of service is as follows. Shop clerks see the customer (tourist?) approaching from a distance. They ready themselves by ceasing conversation and face the shop front. When the customer crosses the invisible line delimiting store territory, the nearest clerk quickly zones in on the mark. "Can I help you sir?"

"No thanks, I'm just looking"

If you have heard of "Singlish", you will know that although the people of Singapore speak English, they speak with their own cute dialect and pronunciation reducing all forms of confirmation (such as "Are you available Tuesday" or "Does the jacket fit?") simply to "Can?" and peppering all their expressions with "La". I discovered that in Singlish "No thanks, I'm just looking" means:

"Please follow me around the store. Do not exceed a distance of 0.5 meters from my person at any time. Keep your eyes keenly focused on me should I have any questions or feel the need to damage or steal something."

After plenty of looking, fantasizing, changing requirements, and personal surveillance, I decided on the Acer travelmate 3210. Since all the shops in the mall sell the same notebooks at the same price points, it took some more looking around to find a deal. The store I eventually went to knocked the tax off and doubled the RAM. The computer came with a bag which I was not even expecting, making this one of my most satisfying purchases ever.

With wireless Internet access at the apartment, I spend most of my time on the computer. It is a part of me I have been missing for a long time. An extension of my brain. Like Paris Hilton without a sex tape, The Netherlands without Amsterdam, or a Japanese girl without a Louis Vuitton handbag, I am nothing without a computer.

In the event you might find this information useful, Sim Lim Square is near Bugis MRT station and Funan is near City Hall MRT station.

And now for some unrelated photos.

For years you ate us. Now I am giant. Prepare to die human!

Amongst other things, do not try to ride your wheel chair up the escalator.

No durians! Penalty to be determined.

Posted by William at 2005年11月07日 00:17

Comments

Posted by: haran at 2005年11月07日 10:18

Posted by: Chris at 2005年11月07日 15:57